May

10

SPRING CLEANING

Filed Under Tears 

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

Once again spring has arrived after many months of Mother Nature hibernating in her winter form. Winter in its symbolic character is a time where living plants and many animals decide to go into a quiet, simple mode. Trees and plants lose their foliage, bears snuggle into their caves to rest and sleep, and the rest of us tend to sit, eat, and gain a few more pounds than we want to paste onto our lethargic bodies.

            Now it can be time for a new beginning.  One that can offer us fresh hope for the coming days ahead. One that brings new opportunities if we are brave enough to journey into the unknown and try something different. And one, if we are willing, encourages us to rid ourselves of old habits, ideas, and behaviors that may not be serving us well. Yep, spring is a glorious time for nature, yet for many of us the analogy and reality of cleaning house can be both tiring and not that enjoyable. Procrastination’s lure is a powerful obstacle.

            For days I have contemplated what things I would keep and what things I might get rid of as I go forward. No, I’m not talking about cleaning out my overstocked closets, cupboards, and drawers, although this might be a good beginning. If only “cleaning” my brain would be so easy. I’m thinking about those beliefs, behaviors, and attitudes that aren’t serving me all that well. You know what I mean, the ones that can make you overly anxious, angry, judgmental, and, really, not the type of person you want to be.

            I could list several pages of what makes me feel like a cleaning is needed. Beginning with the government, politics, apathetic people, wars, PTSD, health care… and items for which I have little or no control. Something like the song, “Let There Be Peace on Earth and Let It Begin with Me” comes to mind. Seems like many times I am criticizing the person with opposite viewpoints, rather than trying to understand his/her position. Next would come, let the past be the past. I can’t change it so why do I keep chewing on it like a pit bull with an old bone? Because I tend to have an anal retentive personality and my over active memory systems feel compelled in having me examine too many angles from a prior experience. Unfortunately, memories may not always be that accurate and replaying them over and over only adjusts the volume instead of focusing the real picture.

            Perhaps all of this “inner” housecleaning comes down to one simple act, forgiveness. Such a modest concept, yet so bloody difficult to achieve. And here come the clincher for all of this – a quote that appeared in an Oprah magazine way back in 2000,

“You become what you believe – not what you wish or want but what you truly believe. Whatever you are in life, look at your beliefs. They put you there.”

Dang, Spring House Cleaning just got a whole lot harder. I wonder if I can get by with merely repainting the walls.

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