Sep

29

Weeping

Filed Under Life, Music, PTSD, Trauma 

by Janet Seahorn 

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Have you ever heard a song a hundred times and never thought much about it? 

Then one day, you are driving down the road with nothing to obscure your mind; you hear this very same song and it suddenly hits a new note, a new way of thinking about the words, and you wonder why did I never recognize the amazing connection? 

Such an incident came to me a week ago while I was steering down the highway.  I heard a song from Josh Groban’s album, Awake, called “Weeping”.  What took me by surprise was how closely the words seemed to describe the silent torment of trauma. 

 How experiencing a truly shocking event, the mind, body, and spirit continues to relive the disturbing details as if they were happening in present time. 

How, no matter what you try, how much you do to contain or remove the frightening thoughts, they still seem to remain.

The words from the song “Weeping” is another way to describe those living with Post Traumatic Stress.  See if you agree – I only wrote down a verse and the poignant chorus.

 

I knew a man, who lived in fear,

It was huge, it was angry, it was drawing near.

Behind his house a secret place

Was the shadow of a demon he could never face.

He built a wall of steal and flame

And men with guns to keep it tamed…

 

It doesn’t matter now,
it’s over anyhow,

He tells the world that it’s sleeping.

But as the night came out

I heard a lonely sound

It wasn’t roaring, it was sleeping.

 

So where are those “secret” places where the demons hide?  And, even more important, how many sufferers are strong and courageous enough to face them, deal with them, and move forward? 

 

For there are no walls high enough, no amount of men with guns that will be able to tame one’s internal demons. 

 

 In the end, perhaps the residue of trauma isn’t fueled by fear and anger at all; perhaps what remains is fueled by a sense of deep sorrow.  A sorrow provoked by dreams of what could have been.  Sorrow from what was lost and the silent weeping formed from loneliness and regret. 

 

And perhaps, with enough time, enough support, and enough courage even the weeping will cease and be replaced with hope and joy.

Comments

One Response to “Weeping”

  1. Tony & Janet Seahorn on October 7th, 2009 6:54 pm

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