Dec

31

HARD DECISIONS

Filed Under Aging, Healing, Tears of a Warrior, Veteran Benefits | Comments Off on HARD DECISIONS

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.”                  -Buckminster Fuller

What is it about change that makes us crazy? Is it the sense of what will be lost against the uncertainty of what might be gained? Is it the reality that in most change situations friendships and services will be altered? Or is it that almost all change requires individuals to deal with the vagueness of questions and conditions that either can’t or are refused answers? At any rate, change demands making decisions that may or may not be made according to what is best for those closest to the resolution. In essence, given our current economy, many decisions are based more on the bottom line of funds, and people are left to make the most of the situation.

 

            For the last several months the veterans and people of Hot Springs, SD have been caught up with a proposal that that will change the way and the location of how VA services are delivered to that area. Currently, Hot Springs has been the home of a large and historically old VA hospital and care center. The plan is to relocate most VA services to Rapid Cityand outsource some services to Fall River Hospital in Hot Springs. The current VA “workforce of 385 employees will be reduced to only 55 by year 2016” (Hot Springs Star, December 20, 2011). It doesn’t take a genius to recognize this type of reduction will greatly effect the resources provided by the hospital as well as impact the economic stability of the area. Since many of the vets in this area are older, few can physically travel to other locations for their health care necessities.

 

            Analyzing the circumstances strictly from a financial perspective, one can understand that newer facilities with upgraded equipment may benefit many of  veterans. The cost of renovating a very old facility may or may not be the best or most cost effective alternative. Truthfully, I haven’t studied the proposal enough, nor do I have access to the data and in-depth thinking of the various involved parties. The only perspective I can address is that of the emotional concerns of many veterans and employees of the Hot Springs Area. Presently there is an enormous amount of confusion which leads to anger and fear. The process of making any future decisions does not seem to be very transparent to most of the Hot Springs people. Without such transparency people tend to distrust those making the decision and, therefore, assume the worst.

 

            It is my continued faith and hope that our government will do everything possible to make sure our veterans and their families are given the health care and resources needed to support their present and future well-being. In our book, Tears of a Warrior, we used a quote from Calvin Coolidge, “The nation which forgets its defenders will itself be forgotten”. In remembering and serving these defenders it is vital that their input and needs are at the forefront of any proposal or decision made in their behalf.

 

“If we send them, then we must mend them.”     www.tearsofawarrior.com

 

Dec

27

The Way

Filed Under Combat PTSD, Dogs, Fishing Therapy, Healing Waters, PTSD treatment, Tears of a Warrior | Comments Off on The Way

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

 

It is a slow Sunday afternoon. One of those undemanding days when there is not much pressing to do; this leaves some time to spend on whatever catches my fancy. Tony has taken his four-legged children on a short fishing trip, allowing me some REAL personal time. Since there are several decent movies showing, I decided to go to a film called The Way.  It is the story about a father, Martin Sheen, who takes over a journey his dead son began. The task was walking a trail from France to a sacred place in Spain. Unfortunately, the son died in an accident his first day out. Of course, the deeper meaning of any such trek is a journey in finding oneself, whether that test is religious, career oriented, healing, or simply the trial to see if one can achieve such an arduous hike.

 

So I got to thinking while watching the movie, what is the Way of a Warrior? Is it a way of violence, death and suffering? Is it a way of courage and sacrifice? Is a warrior’s way a way of freedom? Perhaps a warrior’s true north is a way of Faith. Whatever the answer, one thing is certain; the way of a warrior is not easy and definitely not glamorous. More often than not, war makes it even more difficult for the warrior to find his or her way back to any kind of normality and trust of humanity. Finding the way back can be a lifetime journey for many past and present combatants.

 

One line in the film was pretty reflective, “Life is not about the career you choose but the life you’ve lived”. There can be no doubt that most warriors have lived a variety of lives in one short life time. They have lived the life of a warrior, a friend, a son, a father, a husband, a shattered soul, and a triumphant being. What then will be the rest of a life lived for a warrior? What will be his/her remaining Way?

 

It is my hope the remaining days of every warrior’s way will be softer, kinder and more peace filled. For those who have suffered years of sadness and remorse, may the new way be one of forgiveness and acceptance. During this Holiday Season and anticipation of a New Year, may every person find a special Way to give of themselves in some endeavor that makes a difference… adopt an animal from a shelter, smile and acknowledge that homeless person on the corner of your downtown street, or simply say a silent prayer for another soul in need of comfort.

 

During this season of reflection, find your own unique, individual Way to live with greater joy, less suffering, and fewer reminders of the demons that may have accompanied you home from combat. You and your family deserve a prosperous Way of living each and every one of your future days. Begin NOW!

Dec

21

IN LOVE WITH HOPE

Filed Under Holiday Season, Hope, Tears | Comments Off on IN LOVE WITH HOPE

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

 

Ok, its official, I’m in love with Hope. Always have been. Don’t know why. It defies logic most of the time. When days are good this is an easy task to be in love with Hope. When things are tanking in the toilet being in love with Hope isn’t so simple. For any individual who has experienced loss, trauma, or any of life’s emotional challenges, Hope may be the only thing that serves as one’s raft in a storm. Without Hope it can be impossible to manage getting through the present minute let alone waking up to another tomorrow. Hope is the ingredient that provides emotional as well as a sense of physical safety.

 

            You may ask what gear can we put in our life rafts that may help us sustain our journey with Hope. For a start – include at least one person who believes in us. One person who will stand with us during joyful and difficult times. One person who can demonstrate we are loved and worthwhile. To have that one person be part of our crew we must also be that person for another human being. Taking without giving does nothing to encourage or grow Hope. Another piece of gear is simple giving yourself permission to step back and take time to let go of some of your stressors. Give them up to a higher source or put them in writing and then throw it in the trash. One last, essential item in your boat must be joy. Be willing to search out a bit of joy each day, and be optimistic that a tiny bit of joy will be waiting for you the next.

 

            For me, Hope is the one thing that gives a deeper purpose and meaning to life. In spite of the horrors of combat, warriors (and their families) seem to truly understand such a concept. Being stripped of personal well-being, observing others injured and killed sometimes leaves you with only one thing, and that is the capacity to perceive that our existence has a purpose greater beyond our immediate understanding. This is HOPE in action. Hope that boosts our resilience. Hope that enhances our emotional muscles and Hope that gives us a vision for a better tomorrow.

 

            Whatever our pain, however stressful our lives might be right now, we cannot let these things take up ALL of our time. We must leave some room for laughter, for pleasure, and for joy. Hope can live within us even in what can be the most desperate of times.

 

So here is my Holiday wish for you,

May you be filled with the power of Hope and what can be — Be in Love with Hope.

Happy Holidays

 

Dec

12

HO, HO, OH CRAP

Filed Under Christmas, Tears of a Warrior | Comments Off on HO, HO, OH CRAP

by Janet J. Seahorn

 santa

It’s hard to believe that Christmas is only a few weeks away. The carols are blaring on many radio stations, decorations in stores have been up way before we killed the Thanksgiving turkey, and advertisement to buy what will put you in the poor house are everywhere making one ask after a purchase, “Why the ### did I buy that” and then “How in the ### will I pay for it”. If one isn’t careful, Christmas can increase PTSD and not just in military vets.

 

            When reading through a list of Post-Traumatic Stress indicators I got to reflecting on how many can be aggravated by the holidays. Therefore, instead of making a Christmas list for Santa, I thought it would be far more attention-grabbing to create a list of PTSD Christmas triggers.

 

  • 1. Easily startled – I couldn’t possibly cover all of these but a few could occur with all the bells tingling, unfriendly Santas, and way tooooo many loud people.

 

  • 2. Easily upset – for Tony a short trip to any shopping center quickly attains this mark.

 

  • 3. Feeling tense or anxious – do I really need to explain this one, really? $$$ worries, memories of unpleasant holidays during combat, too much outside stimulation that no one can control.

 

  • 4. Problems maintaining attention or concentrating – advertisers only need you to remain focused for thirty seconds… long enough to give them your credit card.

 

  • 5. Feeling disorganized – WHO DOESN’T at this time of year?

 

  • 6. Nightmares – and these may not be about combat. Think of the songs we hear that aren’t all that cheery like, Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer, any chipmunk song, and if I hear The Twelve Days of Christmas even once I will go bonkers!

 

  • 7. Experience sudden mood swings – Are you kidding; listen to a sad song, watch a funny commercial, open your bundle of bills… most of us are somewhat emotional challenged during this time of year and PTSD only makes it more FUN!

 

  • 8. Hard time dealing with stressful situations – everything is stressful and the only remedy is visit Mother Nature often, stay home and read a good book, or take a Rip Van Winkle nap until January 15th.

 

  • 9. Feeling tired, stomachaches, headaches, aches, aches, and more aches… – have you ever put up a 16 foot Christmas tree, put together some special present that takes an engineering degree to properly assemble, try to learn how to use your new piece of technology… my stomach is already beginning to cringe just writing this section.

 

Now that you are thoroughly depressed, here’s the good news. The Holiday Season can be a beautiful, inspiring time of year, yet only if we intentional focus our attention on what is important and worthwhile in our lives. Things like family, friends, good health, personal freedoms, loving relationships and adoring four legged companions. Many times if we focus on helping another being some of our worries and aches disappear for a bit and we experience the true meaning and joy of the coming days. So let us welcome back our Ho, Hos, and get rid of the CRAP. Happy, Happy, Happy Holidays to everyone.

Dec

5

THE VA BENEFITS ROLLER COASTER

Filed Under Tears of a Warrior, Veteran Benefits, Veterans | Comments Off on THE VA BENEFITS ROLLER COASTER

by Janet J. Seahorn, Ph.D

 va-medical

            Holy Smokes! My brain is reeling like an out of control roller coaster. You know the experience, the climbing to the top of the coaster mountain knowing it is going to plummet to the bottom once there. At times it feels stimulating, and then there’s the “I think I am going to lose my stomach” sensation. Well, this scenario somewhat describes how I left after listening for two hours to a presentation on VA benefits. I went with Tony to learn more about how best to negotiate the system and the process. Honestly, it was quite interesting, although, I must admit, I didn’t understand everything the speaker was telling the audience, nor could I keep up with all the “do this not that”, “go here, not there”, “know this exception or else”. Yikes, no wonder many of our veterans and their families get confused. It truly takes an expert in the organization to help lead you successfully through the government maze of regulations.

            Following are a few items I gleaned from the session that perhaps some of our readers will find helpful. Keep in mind that the VA is concerned with treating the whole person where other government organizations are mainly focused on the medical issues.

  • 1. First, whether you like it or not you will need to have and be somewhat comfortable using a computer since all forms and many interactions are now on-line. If you are one of those who are somewhat computer illiterate, grab a friend or family member to help with the process. A few websites that can be very useful: www.Ebenefits.va.gov (this site gives you access to your vet information) www.Healthmil/PDBR (this is the site for getting the process underway to leave the military).

 

  • 2. Something many veterans do not know is that they are eligible for problems that occur as a result of their major injury or condition. These are called “Secondary Problems“.

 

  • 3. For new vets leaving the military, some States have places were individuals can go and get all of their needs, benefits, sign-up forms, and medical tests done in one setting. Not only does this speed up the process, it cuts down on the frustration of visiting several places over a span of several weeks.

 

  • 4. As you put in for your benefits, understand that it takes a minimum of ten days to be processed before the information shows up on the Ebenifits website, and this only occurs if the VA has all of the needed medical records.

 

  • 5. Now this leads us to getting those medical records…Go and Get Them YOURSELF. If you rely on your doctor’s office sending this information to the VA once it is requested, you may be waiting as long as six months before they get around to sending it. This is not the VA’s fault. Since doctors offices do not get reimbursed for doing this task, some are not very eager to move it forward in a timely manner.

 

  • 6. Understand that once your benefits begin, the government will send your funds to your bank using Direct Deposit. If you don’t have a bank, they will send you a debit card. There will no longer be any CHECKS written to an individual. Understand it is YOUR responsibility to give the VA the correct bank routing number or account number, or address. If you move and forget to send them you new address, you will probably have trouble getting your funds. If your benefits begin on Feb. 1st, your first funds will come through until March 1st. Many organizations work on this type of a timeline.

 

  • 7. If you were a Marine stationed at Camp Lejeune (www.lejeune.usmc.mil) before 1986, immediately go to their website to obtain information on filing a claim regarding medical conditions stemming from a toxic waste situation in the area. This also applies to our current vets who served in Balaud, Iraq where it was common practice to burn their waste, including plastic water bottles. The results of being exposed to the toxic smoke can cause colon cancer, lymphoma, respiratory problems… Down the road similar consequences may come from exposure to the sands in Iraq and Afghanistan.

 

  • 8. Also, did you know that many of our veterans are eligible for a VA home loan that may be far better than those offered by the FHA. This was an AHA for us. Check out www.homeloans.va.gov or www.hopenow.comwebsites or call the Homeownership Preservation Foundation at 1-888-995-HOPE (4673).

 

  • 9. And last, it is very important that every veteran is aware of the processes for filing a claim, receiving benefits, etc. Be sure to read EVERY piece of information or mail that comes to you. Don’t put it aside and think you will get back to it later. Read it immediately. Answer any and all phone calls from your VA centers as soon as possible. And be persistent as long as you take responsibility for what you need to do to help process your claims and benefits.  

After listening to so much information and needing a Tylenol or Latte badly, I came to the following conclusions:

One – every vet needs to take the appropriate responsibility for getting his needs met. Blaming won’t get the job done; being proactive has a better chance of success.

Two – and please don’t scoff at this because I am sometimes tempted to do so, try to believe in the VA’s motto, “Grant if you can, only deny if you have to”. If you feel the person you are working with isn’t doing enough, ask for someone else to assist you. Often times getting a fresh pair of eyes and ears can make a huge difference. What I saw and heard today confirmed that there are many individuals in the VA organization who are incredibly dedicated to making a difference to our country’s veterans. We know of many and are grateful for their efforts.

            Good Luck and take your patience pills – dealing with any huge organization, especially the government will require an abundance of endurance.