By Janet J. Seahorn

When is it time to seek outside help?

This is pretty easy to answer: You will know if it is time to seek outside help when the behavior of the serviceperson becomes abnormally un-normal.  When life becomes a teeter-totter of ups and downs that can’t seem to be controlled no matter how hard you try. When your surroundings and relationships seem unstable and unsafe and you aren’t sure why, get help.

When my husband began experiencing PTSD, neither one of us had a clue what was going on at the time. There was no such thing as Post-Traumatic Stress. War was something that a person went to, came home from and tried to move on. It wasn’t discussed. It wasn’t thought about (or so we once thought and wanted to believe).

No one considered how the events of combat could impact an individual for the rest of his life. If you came home somewhat physically whole, that was a gift. You healed physically, and you lived as if all the horror from battle never happened. The past was the past and it should not impact one’s future. What an absurd assumption. 

Now we understand that nothing in our past is ever fully in the past. The good and the difficult follow us wherever we go. We are part of our experiences. With understanding, courage, and information we may gain strength and wisdom to move forward. Getting outside help can guide us in forming the wisdom and understanding needed for healing.

What are some good resources for help with PTSD or TBI?

There are many resources available to our military service men and women. Check with your local Veteran’s Administration Center if you suspect you need support. You may need to be referred to a Veteran Hospital for further testing and diagnosis, especially if you suspect a traumatic brain injury. Every state has several local centers that have been established to help veterans find the appropriate placement and support needed to get the services they may require. (VA Centers are listed in our book)

Don’t stop at NO if you are convinced you have something wrong that necessitates some form of treatment. Sometimes all you need is that one special person who can take your situation seriously enough to get help. Our family personally saw this happen with my brother.  He was extremely wary of anyone associated with the government. As a Vietnam vet, his mistrust of a broken, ineffective system made him reluctant to seek help from a military or veteran organization of any kind. Once he decided to seek services he ran into several brick walls. Yet, he kept trying, until he finally found a former army sergeant who took his situation seriously and made things happen.

It only took one person to make a difference. Don’t’ give up or give in to frustration. Keep going. Help is available, but sometimes you may have to fight for it just like you did in battle.  If you did it then, you can do it now.

In ending, we want to thank you and your loved ones for your service and sacrifice. You have made a difference that few will understand, or perhaps fully appreciate. Nevertheless, please recognize the depth of your courage, strength and warrior spirit. These are the attributes that sustained you through combat, and now they will do so again in moving you towards healing and a better life.

Question 4:  If I, as a serviceperson, have PTSD, how can I help myself?

First, be honest with yourself.  As stated in the last question, do not ignore the signs that you are suffering from serving in combat.  Do not pretend that things are fine; that the problem lies with everyone around you such as your spouse, children, neighbors, family, or co-workers.  Watch for signs such as increased anger, irritability, depression, and/or isolation from normal family events. Resisting the feelings associated with PTSD only exacerbates the problem. The best thing you can do if you think something is not normal is to visit your Veteran’s Center as soon as possible.  These centers have become much more proficient in serving the military population’s needs than they were during past conflicts.  Physicians and therapists now recognize and understand in better detail the effects of PTSD and how to treat it.  Don’t wait.  Help is available.  The sooner you get assistance, the sooner your life will begin to move forward in a manner that allows you to live more fully.  You deserve to be at peace, to be happy and so does your family.  You and your loved ones have given enough in serving your country.  Now it is time that your country does something for you.  Help is waiting; don’t wait another minute to get it.  Life is too precious to be wasted fighting demons from the past. Today is the only thing you have that will make a difference for tomorrow.  So use today wisely to gain understanding, healing, and perhaps some peace of mind and spirit.

Other suggestions include spending time outdoors. Nature offers us a tremendous healing environment, especially for emotional wounds. We find hiking, fishing, skiing, and simply just being in the wilderness soothes much of our anxieties and internal tensions. Pets are also a therapeutic comfort. A great deal of research has been conducted that has shown the positive impact animals have on a person’s well being. Because our pets love us unconditionally, are non-judgmental, and provide a sense of safety and security, they are one of the very best options for keeping us sane and healthier both physically and emotionally. A few additional suggestions that we have found quite beneficial are meditation, aroma therapy (no kidding J), body massage, and heavy doses of laughter. Humor is a terrific medication since it is almost impossible to be angry and laughing at the same time. It releases endorphins that alleviate body pain, and provides a huge dose of oxygen to the brain and muscles.

Question 5:  What can I, as a family member, do to help someone with PTSD or a TBI?

There can be a major difference between a person suffering from PTSD and someone who has incurred a TBI (traumatic brain injury).  A TBI is a physical injury to the brain, where PTSD is more a reordering of the neuro networks in the brain.  Many times a person with a TBI may also have some form of PTSD, mainly because he/she was in a situation that caused physical and emotional damage to the individual and/or others in the company.  As with all illness and trauma, the more informed you become the better you are at making appropriate decisions in handling the circumstances. Illness and problems must first begin with immediate recognition that something is not quite right. The sooner you recognize the signs of PTSD, the sooner you can begin the healing process.  Once again, it is dangerous to ignore the obvious and pretend things will get better with time. Too often, this does not happen by itself.  Time can make behaviors and tensions more precarious, destroying personal relationships and family cohesion. No one benefits by waiting. Spouses get tired of walking through the “mindfields” of the traumatized serviceperson.  Children suffer because they can’t and don’t’ understand why mommy or daddy are not always the same kind; loving parents they were before war. 

When a family member returns from combat with PTSD, everyone close to him must join together to offer support, hope, and comfort.  In doing so, however, you must set suitable boundaries that will keep the family safe and well-balanced.  If children are involved, they must be at the forefront of your concern.  Their physical and emotional well-being is of utmost important.  Living with a parent who has untreated PTSD can have long-term, negative consequences on a developing child.  Getting immediate treatment for your spouse and yourself will be the best line of defense in moving towards the life you want to live and the family unit you want to be.

by Janet J. Seahorn

War is hell, and there is no polite way to put it. 

But when modern war is fought by women as well as men, it can take an even more challenging toil on a family and community. 

As Americans, we are quickly learning that our country and its military facilities are struggling to provide appropriate treatment for its female troops.  There are many services for men; yet, we are not prepared to offer some of the same options for women.

This week I had two events occur from two different parts of the country.  The first was a disturbing phone call from a friend, who has several family members serving in the military.  All have fought in Iraq. Her son has been to both Iraq and Afghanistan on numerous tours of duty.

Her concern, however, was for her female family member.  After serving in Iraq the military woman has been home for almost three years, taking care of two small children while working full time in a demanding job.  The young mother had been exposed to a great deal while deployed, and has done her best to return to normal life stateside.

 Most of the time things are fine, but a few weeks ago, the memories, anxieties, and panic attacks returned with a vengeance.  As we have discussed numerous times in our blogs, the ghosts of combat often come back to take up residence in the homes of the military personnel. 

Without hesitation, this bright lady and her family sought help through the VA.  She has wisely enrolled in our local VA Clinic upon return from combat.  This time, however, she would need more intense treatment. 

Not a problem, except, that the only facility that could accommodate women only is in another state, making the decision to leave her family and work a great deal more difficult.

The second incident came via an article in the New York Times which was sent to me exactly two days after the first event.  Reading over the article’s information was all too familiar.  I had heard it just two days before.  The article by Damien Cave stated, “Never before has this country seen so many women paralyzed by the psychological scars of combat. 

As of June 2008, 19,084 female veterans of Iraq or Afghanistan had received diagnoses of mental disorders from the Department of Veteran Affairs, including 8,454 women with a diagnosis of post-traumatic stress — and this number does not include troops still active, or those who have never used the V.A. system” (Internet, Nov. 1, 2009).

The article continued to comment on what we have heard from many female vets, that because they are women, “people underestimate what these women have been through” (Resick, Internet, Nov. 1, 2009). 

Since war has been traditionally fought by men, we have seen the Humpty-Dumpty effect. But what happens when Humpty is Mom?  What happens when Mom is the wounded warrior? What happens to the children?  What happens to the organizational system of the home: the washing, cooking, cleaning, and daily tasks? 

Who steps up to help nurture the nurturer when she needs comfort, care, and support?  These are vital questions that need to be explored and addressed.

When Humpty-Dumpty is Mom, she can be put back together; however, the tools and glue may be pink instead of blue.

-by Janet Seahorn

It had been several months since I last saw him.  The end of last semester during finals to be exact.  He had been a student in one of my university classes.  He was a big, strapping, young man who almost always had a smile on his face and some funny comments to amuse his table mates.

Before that semester began, I knew that several of my new students were National Guard or had served in the military; he was among them. On one occasion, he told me that he had been on active duty and had just returned from a tour in a war zone. Iraq one day, and the next day he was signed up and attending classes at the university.  No transition time whatsoever.  Yet, he seemed to take it all in stride. He even joined a fraternity. 

A few times I had spoken with him about some of his experiences and asked if he knew anything about Post Traumatic Stress.  Without much dialogue he nodded and mentioned that he had some symptoms but he was coping quite well.  And by all outward appearance and on most days he was fine.  Only a few times did I recognize the demons had visited him, but thankfully, they didn’t seem to stay very long. 

The semester wore on without much concern until the last month when he was absent a few times - until then he attended every class and only missed on rare occasions.  One absence occurred the first day of class.  He had e-mailed me ahead of time to let me know he would be missing that session because he was attending the funeral of one of his best friends.  Only later did I learn the funeral was a young marine who had been in our local papers and had recently died in Iraq. 

The marine had been a close high school friend.  They had been star players on their football team, shared Saturday night outings  built on a foundation of boyhood friendship. 

After our “catch-up” talk, he mentioned that the summer had been tough.  He had an accident which broke some bones in his ankle.  He could not participate in all of the fun activities that had anticipated during the school year.  Given the pain and the down time of recuperation, the memories resurfaced; the trauma of his tour of duty in Iraq, what he saw and had to cope with, the decisions he had to make on a daily basis - returned to haunt him. 

Typical of his strong personality, he downplayed most of the symptoms.  Yet, this is an intelligent young man.  He did not dismiss the symptoms and stated that he was getting help for his PTSD.  Just knowing this put my mind at ease.  I could only imagine what courage it took to take this step.  Hopefully, other vets who know him will follow his example.  He will get better - faster, in a healthier manner. 

Just a side note: I no longer choose to call this a “disorder”.  It seems to me the more I learn and understand this phenomenon, the more I believe that PTS(D) is the minds/body’s incredibly creative way to deal with an unusually horrendous life event. 

Had the mind not employed the immediate reaction of numbing and stuffing the event, the person may have died.  To avoid the ultimate death sentence, the mind/brain made a split second decision to unconsciously remove itself from the trauma until a later time; a time when the body was safe to explore the event without being in the line of fire. 

Pretty amazing and effective when you think about it.  If the brain wasn’t such a protective, innovative problem solver many of us would not be around today.  Yea, for our amazing brain.  Maybe it is not “disordered” at all, just creatively restructured for a bit.

In a few weeks I will attend a conference on Traumatic Brain Injury (TBIs).  Of course I will be writing about this experience and sharing some of the information with our blog readers.  Stay tuned.

by Janet & Tony Seahorn

It was a small, black & white, furry 5-pound bundle of emotional and physical relief.  His name was Petie, the keeper of an adult warrior, Purple Heart, Vietnam Veteran.

The vet trained him as his first alert.  An important task.  Petie knew when his master needed to take his medications.  He would wakeup Dennis at various times in the middle of the night so that specific pills were administered at the most critical time in order to keep the Post Traumatic Stress under control. 

Dennis trained Petie especially for this purpose. They are best friends and constant companions, never apart.  This small, furry medic is essential, not just for the vet’s physical well-being, but even more important, his emotional/mental stability. 

Petie alerts Dennis when there is danger in the surroundings. He watches intently everything that goes on with his owner and around his owner.  If Petie isn’t comfortable his master knows to pay closer attention to his current environment.  If Petie doesn’t like you, more than likely Dennis isn’t going to become too friendly either. 

They coexist, two different species, one functioning entity.

There are numerous organizations that train service dogs.  Dogs that serve the deaf, blind, and epileptic individual. Dogs that act as the arms and legs of those who no longer have capacity to move on their own.  Now, some of these groups are training dogs to do something even more challenging, knowing when their owner may go into a PTSD anxiety attack. 

The dog must sense when such attacks may occur before they actually manifest themselves.  They know even before the person that something is coming on - giving their owner an opportunity to breathe, use relaxation techniques, and take medication if necessary.  They provide a sense of security and well-being in a world filled with unpredictability and potential stressors.

One such training organization is NEADS - Dogs for Deaf and Disabled Americans.

They are conducting an in-depth study of nine-ten Iraq vets who has severe PTSD. The study’s focus is to evaluate the most effective canine training methods that serve the sensitive needs of a veteran suffering from combat stress. 

This is a very expensive and challenging research project because it must take into account the behaviors of two very different organisms: human and canine.

It will be a critical piece of information given the increasing number of individuals returning from the Iraq and Afghanistan theaters and those that have served in past wars such as Vietnam and the Gulf War.

We’ve all seen how dogs and other pets can have healing powers. A pilot program in California pairs service dogs with returning veterans with brain injuries and emotional problems. Freedom Dogs is a non-profit agency in San Diego that trains service dogs to do anything from retrieving items to providing a comforting distraction from PTSD symptons. To read the full story, click here.

Psych Central has an article about the rising incidents of PTSD in female soldiers. Even though women are technically barred from combat, many are exposed to battle as they serve in support functions in combat areas.

Click here to read the article.